Thursday, April 30, 2009

Oh, The Eccentric Me

Well, I was bored. So I decided to try this online personality disorder test. Let's see if I'm truly crazy and need help.

Disorder | Rating

Paranoid: High
Schizoid: Moderate
Schizotypal: High
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Low
Histrionic: Low
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: High
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: High

Here's the URL for it: http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_test.mv

So those were the results of the test. Pretty accurate, in my opinion. Oh and yes, I do have OCD but it's not that serious.

Well, at least I'm not totally demented...yet.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

I Was Made For "Chasing Dreams"

I usually have dreamless sleeps, but there are some occasions where dreams visit me. What's weird is, these dreams always present the same situation. I keep dreaming about people chasing me. Well, except for the dream I had last night, where I was running away from zombies. They're not exactly people, are they? Anyway, I had other dreams that were unique. On one occasion, I dreamed that I escaped from prison and the cops were after me. on another (and this is no joke), I dreamed that I was running away from the INCREDIBLE HULK. I don't know why these characters appear, but they probably have something to do with my everyday life (the Hulk?!).

Because I was already being choked by my curiosity, I searched for the meaning of dreams online. I came across this site which had an accurate explanation about the dreams I experienced. According to DreamMoods.com, chase dreams are common. They often occur when the person has feelings of anxiety. It said there that my actions in the dreams represent my response to pressure, fear, and stress. So i guess the pursuers in my dreams symbolize what I run from in my waking life. Anyway, the site also explained that the distance between me and the one chasing me signifies how serious my problem is. If my pursuer maintains a small gap between us, then that means my problem will not disappear soon. In addition to the explanation, the site also gave advice. The next time I dream about being hunted down, I should turn around and confront the pursuer. I should ask him why he's running after me. Well honestly, I don't know how I would do that because I don't know how to control my dreams, but it's worth a try.

I have to say, the site was right. That's why I mentioned it had an 'accurate' account on chase dreams. I do always feel anxious. I also hate having to feel all this pressure. Everyone expects so much from me. And what's more, I can't stand coping up with people's disappointment when I fail at something. It's like I'm not permitted to make mistakes. Well, I'm not a genius. They should realize that by now. Since this has been going on for a long time, I learned to not care about it. I turn the other cheek when others try to express their dissatisfaction. I try to mentally turn down the volume of the irritating voices. So I guess that's how I run away from all that stress and pressure. Although I do have another method...FOOD! that's another escape from stress. No wonder I'm getting fat.

Anyway, thanks for reading.